are we thewaiting

Sunday, February 04, 2007

.wretchedness.

I've been feeling so much of disorientation lately that it has ostensibly become a relatively permanent part of my present life. And as usual, in the light of matters, I tend to blame the stupid weather or the lousy songs on the radio for my state of unsettledness. Sometimes-or rather, very often-, in a rush to find some instant relief from all the restlessness, I start acting a little insane- I will do crazy tuck-in jumps all of a sudden before screaming incomprehensible song lyrics at the top of my lungs followed by more tuck-in jumps and MORE screaming. Ha ha!

Perhaps the shit you have to deal with in JC is nothing in comparison with the bigger and bitch-ier problems that will come your way later on in life. But I think that we should all be entitled brief moments to wallow in self pity and bitterness. Not because we want to, but because we need to. And also because these are moments that help us keep in touch with the good things in life. Crazy as it may sound. But those psychopathic moments of jumping and screaming are what make me grateful and sane. :)

So scream. And jump. And feel bitter. Because it's okay to feel bad and lousy and be insane. They are all just our own little ways to keep sober and alive.

jerrie kicks;; 12:13 PM